17 February 2007

I wonder, but I worry

In a past post I have mentioned that I often fall asleep with the t.v. on. What I didn't mention is, that sometimes while the show continues its run, that it enters my dreams. It is an odd experience, dreaming of a show that is currently airing but while I am in my dream state,and I accept it as reality. When I wake-up and realize what was going I can't help but chuckle to myself. Just last night, I was watching an action packed "Justice League Unlimited" episode( the one where Superman fights Captain Marvel) then next thing I know I am dreaming the scene. I guess what happens is that my brain picks up the audio from the show and pumps it into my brain. I also guess my brain, is tired of having weird and depressing dreams and decided to "kick things up a notch" a bit. Something else that makes me wonder about this phenomena. How hard would it be to plant an idea or command into someone using this method? I dunno, but I hope my cat,Sniper, doesn't pick up on this idea. Oh, by the way have I ever mentioned that Sniper is the most wonderful, kind, and loving cat I ever knew. I most obey her and give her milk. I cannot deny her commands, resistance is futile. See yall soon (I hope).

14 February 2007

V-Day

V-day is here again and I am not incorrectly referring to the anniversary of the end of World War II. I am referring to the pointless V-day, also know as Valentine's Day. In a previous blog, Quizibuck truly defined what Valentine's Day is: Single Awareness Day (a.k.a. SAD). Yes, single/dateless people get to sit on the sidelines and watch the other half celebrate love with, cards, candy that come in heart shaped boxes, and roses. I know no one is being forced to watch the other half celebrate this day, but unless one is staying home all day, there is no way to avoid it. Being reminded of what you don't have has a funny way of rubbing a person the wrong way.

There are some advantages of being single and unattached, but to be honest my heart isn't in it. Originally, I planned to have a blog that puts a positive spin for us lonely people,that would help us get through this day, but I changed my mind during a restless night. I realized that in good conscience I cannot offer any positive ideas, because I do not feel positive on the subject. I hate to whine and complain on my blogs, but I have to be honest.

I am no longer in my 20's and I still have no girlfriend or any prospects for one. I consider myself to be a person who is generally courteous and is willing to improve one's self. This is not to say that I don't have my bad days (trust me I do). The one thing that gets me the most is that I see guys that are either act rude to their girlfriends (OK, you can call them assholes). Standing and seeing a guy treating their girlfriend like they own them is hard for me. Why aren't these men lonely, I have no clue. I still hope someday, that the right person will arrive. I still can't help myself on hoping for that, but I do wonder at times. So, what do I do till then? Well, the only thing I can do, continue to improve myself. So when, I find myself with a loved one I can be the best man I can be for her.

To the other half I say this: Celebrate till your heart is content, but keep us in your minds and hearts. Oh, and another thing, don't take all the candy. We like to get our share on the 15Th, when they are on clearance.

13 February 2007

Your help is needed!

We here at Battle Plan would like to make a request.

If we could all take a time out from the pink hearts, the flower delivery, the greeting card purchases, and make a point out the most desperate plight of those most brave people - the singles.

Yes, February 14 is Singles Awareness Day, a day where we draw attention to the single males and females of the world. Did you know that in the United States, about 27 percent of households are people living alone?

These poor souls need the help of those people who are dating, engaged, or married. Only by following one or more of the suggestions below will single men and women survive the entire day. All you folks in a relationship, donate generously!

  • Single people require mass quantities of chocolate for sustenance. During the month of February, chocolate production is in full swing, allowing single people to purchase chocolate in mass quantities for storage during the long weeks before Easter. So please, anyone in a relationship, avoid purchasing chocolate after February 14. Single people will be needing it.
  • Those in a relationship who live in apartment buildings, or quiet neighborhoods, please be aware that sound carries. Please move your beds as far away from the walls in preparation for intercourse. Consider playing music or movies so that single neighbors don't have to listen to your mating rituals. (Note: Fantasia, or any kids movie for that matter, is not an acceptable choice for a movie)
  • Relationship folks, stick to your normal feeding grounds on February 14, such as your romantic French restaurants - basically any place that has candles on the tables. Single people will be requiring the use of bars, fast food restaurants, and especially doughnut and ice cream places.
  • Baby talk and/or holding hands while swinging your arms in public places is not acceptable behavior on February 14. This behavior is likely to incite violence against you by single people.
  • If shopping, tip your clerk generously, where applicable. If while standing in line you notice the clerk is unhappy in any way, they are likely single, and were forced to work because all their co-workers in relationships called in sick. Do not show pity to these single people. Single people can sense pity, and are likely to lash out in anger.
These and other tips should ensure a safe and happy Singles Awareness Day. Being single is a growing problem, and with your help, the sponsors behind Singles Awareness Day hope to have the singles affliction wiped out completely by 2012. Want to know more about Singles Awareness Day? Leave a comment and we here at Battle Plan will be happy to help.

09 February 2007

I want a new drug

I was recently pointed in the direction of this article, while this article explains why many people haven't heard about it.

It seems that scientists cured cancer.

Okay, not exactly. Scientists in Canada discovered that a drug that's been used for years for metabolism disorders, can kill cancer cells. While many people's opinion would have you believe that the reason this hasn't gotten out is because the drug is cheap, wouldn't profit the drug companies, and therefore the drug companies are suppressing it. In reality, clinical trials have not yet begun on humans, so there is no guarantee it works yet.

That doesn't let the drug companies off the hook though. The above info does offer me a segue way into a topic I've been meaning to discuss. The past few years have seen the American public get bombarded with ads for drugs. Drugs that will help you sleep, that will stop your allergies, that lower cholesterol, and offer "natural male enhancement." It seems no matter the ailment, the drug companies have a cure for you.

Sure, the drugs will cost a lot of money, but it's a small price to pay for wellness, right? Oh, and there might be a few side effects as well. Just listen to the fast-talking guy at the end of the commercials, he'll run off that list of side effects for you. I find it peculiar though, that in an ad for a sleep aid, one of the side effects was drowsiness. Oh really?? A sleep aid might make me sleepy as a side effect? Oh, and I forgot what drug it was, but one of the side effects listed was death. Yes, you read that right. DEATH.

And yet many doctors in private practice are willing to pawn these drugs off to you without hesitation. A few years back I went into the doctor for what reason I can't recall, but it certainly wasn't cholesterol related. And yet the doctor miraculously pointed out my cholesterol could use some lowering, and gave me the latest thing in cholesterol-lowering drugs. It felt like the office scene in What About Bob. It was like, "you know, this revolutionary new drug just came on the market...ahh!"

I don't have the best health insurance in the world (like much of the U.S.) so my miracle drug cost..well, let's say it was a lot. Needless to say I didn't refill the prescription. That's the big kick in the pants for most people. These pills probably don't cost much to make, but they sure as heck will charge you a ton of money for them. Many people can't afford such drugs. I used to enjoy my parents' government health insurance. It covered just about everything. Antidepressants didn't cost all that much. But once I went "out on my own" with the health insurance, I had to (dangerously) phase out my antidepressants, because bottles cost well over $100.

That's the big annoyance in all this: money. People in the pharmaceutical companies make big bucks. They push the drugs on the private practice doctors, who then also make big bucks. In the meantime, the doctors who do the "real" medicine - the ones in the hospitals and emergency rooms - typically don't make all that much. And the people who need the care can't afford all that much either. Forget about getting sick or injured, people - we simply can't afford it. Strange to think our health care system lags behind so many other countries.

The pharmaceutical companies KNOW they are gouging the populace with the prices. And the populace, being the geniuses we are, still buy the drugs. After all, we "need" them. At least that's what the commercials are telling us. You won't get a good night's sleep without our drugs (despite many home remedies). You won't lower your cholesterol without our drugs (despite many foods that lower it). Oh and men, your wife won't love you if you don't naturally enlarge your man parts.

But guess what, people. The medical community just isn't that smart sometimes! Cocaine used to be a medical treatment. Oh, and doctors used to do commercials for cigarettes.

That's not to say I won't fall into the "natural" cure trap. (Admit it, you've seen his book in stores and thought about purchasing it) Nope, I'm just left to accept the truth. I can't escape the plethora of drug ads on TV. I can't escape private practice doctors pushing drugs on me. Oh well. I'm out of things to say. Is there a drug that will help that?

04 February 2007

Place your bets!

Super Bowl 41 (or, "XLI" as the fancy-pants NFL likes to call it) is quickly approaching and will be played tonight. The Super Bowl has always been a haven for people getting together and having a gool 'ol party. But it's also been a haven for betting types. For all you gambling addicts, here are some of the things you can bet on for the big game:

  • Whether the rendition of the National Anthem is under or over a certain length
  • Who wins the coin toss
  • Whether the coin toss is heads or tails
  • Who scores first
  • Who scores last
  • Who scores the first field goal
  • Who scores the first touchdown
  • Whether or not there is a safety
  • Whether or not there is a two point conversion
  • Whether or not there is a missed field goal
  • Whether the first field goal is wide left or wide right
  • Whether or not there will be a coaches challenge,
  • Who will be the coach to issue the challenge,
  • Whether the challenge will be upheld or overturned
  • Points scored
  • First team to have a turnover
  • Whether or not a streaker will run across the field
  • How many Budweiser beer commercials there will be

And that's just for starters! Hurry up, time's running out!