How about some culture, dammit

I came to the conclusion that Battle Plan just doesn't have enough culture. So, I've decided to include some makeshift poetry.

This is my first attempt at a haiku, so be kind.

A Haiku
I am sleeping sound
Mocha nudges me roughly
Fuzzy wake up call

Things that make you go "What The --?!!"

I've always been a fan of comic books. Primarily Marvel Comics, but I've dabbled into DC Comics once in awhile.

I'd read rumors about All-Star Batman and Robin, The Boy Wonder on the Internet, and I had to check it out for myself.

The All-Star line of DC Comics is intended to allow rotating groups of well-known writers and artists to give their take on a character. They're not necessarily bound by the history of the character, either. Think of it as a "re-envisioning."

For Batman and Robin the first duo would be Frank Miller and Jim Lee.

Some consider Frank Miller the rebel of comic book writing. He hates certain characters and certain cliches, and will waste no time in expressing said hatred. He had a legendary run on Daredevil and has done other well-known works such as The Dark Knight Returns and Sin City.

Jim Lee is a talented artist who helped revive the X-Men in the 90's. His redesign of many characters was the basis for character design in X-Men: The Animated Series. He has a pension for drawing characters doing what should be physically impossible feats, but he has a good eye for detail.

With those two at the helm, what could go wrong?

Um..

When I completed my look at the first 4 issues, I thought, "How did DC let this see print?"

Some remarkably odd items:

- Batman running over (and apparently killing) cops.
- Superman's brief appearance and only lines of dialogue? "Damn!"
- Dick Grayson, Age Twelve!
- Batman hitting Dick Grayson.
- The Magic Milk Carton

And many others. Best I direct you to one of the most complete, and funny, reviews of the series (warning: naughty language ahead): Click Me!

If I had to make any kind of sense from this series, is that there is a slim chance Frank Miller may actually be trying to present a different kind of Batman, one with deep seeded mental problems, primarily delusions. His parents were killed, so he groomed himself into this fighting machine. He mentions "drafting" Dick Grayson, so I guess in Batman's mind, he is the General, and anyone suffering his fate or a similar one will be summarily drafted and prepared for "war."

Who knows. Maybe it's just Frank Miller writing whatever the hell he feels like. This could be all one joke. I almost expect the last issue to feature Bruce Wayne waking up and going "Wow, what a nightmare!"

Sightedness

I've often wondered how, over the past few years, people having become less patient and less caring about others.

Could it be they are losing their sight?

Not literally, of course. I'm talking in the "losing sight of the big picture," "losing sight of the plight of others." Instead of the conditions "farsighted" and "nearsighted," I've come up with the terms "innersighted" and "outersighted."

An "innersighted" person, which is the most common affliction, only keeps sight of themselves. They only care about what affects them, so if anything slows them down, inconveniences them, or what not, they get mad.

An "outersighted" person is one who generally only keeps sight of others. They watch over friends and family and protect them, sometimes at the risk of their own happiness.

Perfect 20/20 vision is rare. And there isn't any laser surgery for something like this.

How did this all come about, you say? Well, I'm glad you asked!

While shopping at the store the other day, I was almost ran over by a woman. I was walking towards the exit, in plain sight of anyone who might be in the aisles. She was in one of the aisles, coming out and apparently headed elsewhere in the store. Again, I was in plain sight. I wasn't walking fast. The woman, who was looking straight ahead, exits the aisle. I figure, she'll see me and the guy who was somewhat behind me.

Nope. She didn't notice until I was jumping out of the way, screaming "Watch it!!!"

"Oh excuse me," she said rather unconvincingly, as I gathered myself from the merchandise I had tossed myself into.

She had her shopping cart full of things, her shopping list.. painfully unaware of anything going on around her. Had we been driving, we'd have two wrecked cars and some injured people.

If only there were corrective lenses for a condition such as this. No, the only way to cure it is through self-improvement. Too bad most people are so far gone in their innersightedness that this will not come to be.

What about me? Am I innersighted? Outersighted? Well, considering I am observant enough to catch everyone's little foibles, I'd have to say I'm quite outersighted.

Pizza Pizza

I've often purchased a brand of frozen pizza that offers a barbeque chicken pizza. It's pretty good, albeit a bit on the small and pricy side. But, as with many things you can buy pre-packaged, there seems to be an adequate home substitute.

This is a barbeque chicken pizza I literally threw together. My contributor already has tried it and liked what he tasted. The really good thing about the recipe is that its very adaptable. So here we go..

BARBEQUE CHICKEN PIZZA
You will need:
1 pizza shell (I used Boboli)
1 to 1 1/2 cups of your favorite barbeque sauce
1 small or 1/2 medium onion
chicken (see comments below)
your favorite kind of shredded cheese

The chicken is probably the most adapatable part. You can use some leftover grilled chicken you made the night before, you can used canned chicken, any kind you want. I just happened to use the prepackaged chicken strips you find in the refrigerated meats section, usually by the "quick meals." In regards to the cheese, you can use any kind you want. Mozerella is of course the "traditional," but I used a mix I had of mozerella, provolone, and parmesan. And as a side tip, I generally like to brush the pizza shell with a bit of olive oil.

Dice and then sautee your onion in a little butter (or butter flavored cooking spray). Add it along with your chicken and barbeque sauce into a saucepan. Add as much chicken as you want, but of course be careful with the amount of bbq sauce, as you will get a messy pizza real fast. Heat the ingredients over medium heat to a simmer.

Pour the mixture on the pizza shell and even it out as much as possible. Cover with your cheese. A good key is to make sure you cover all of the bbq chicken mixture with the cheese, to get a nice "dome" to seal the toppings in. Cook the pizza according to the shell directions (usually at about 450 degrees for 5-10 minutes).

Be sure to allow about 5 minutes to cool. You don't want a burned mouth, do you?

Comments of course welcome!

Historical Value?

Can anyone tell me why The History Channel was showing Mad Max last night?

Drunken Cat Hisses at Vets!

Okay, not drunken. But poor Mocha sure seemed it. She went to the vet on Thursday to receive a tooth cleaning. Teeth cleaning for cats usually involves the cat being put under anesthesia, and this case was no exception.

When I came to pick her up, the vets said that Mocha hissed at them when they put her in her crate to go home, unusual behavior for Mocha, who usually only hisses at dogs.

When we got home, the poor cat was so tired, and walked around almost in a stumble. I feel almost guilty in saying that I enjoyed the evening, as Mocha was very quiet, and I didn't get the usual "talking" out of her. Oddly enough, while she should have been resting, she got up a lot just to walk around. Clearing out the cobwebs I guess.

But by now Mocha is back to her old self. Which is all well and good, but she's gotten most of her strength back too, which is a disadvantage when I try to give her her antibiotics. That is one wily, slippery cat.

Worst Fireworks Ever

Ever know you want to do something, and have plenty of time to do it, but you don't end up doing it regardless? That's me and this blog this week.

I went along with my brother and his wife to a local fireworks show here in Dallas, and for the life of me, I can't remember a worse fireworks show. The show barely lasted 10 minutes, and lacked the typical "finale" most fireworks shows have - you know, when they shoot off a ton of fireworks in the span of about 2 minutes. Nope, this show was as random and as dull as it gets. My sister-in-law mentioned on our way back to the car that she overheard a man apologizing to his family for how poor the show was.

Also, as with most 4th of July events, they had a plethora of foods. There was a booth called "Fried What?" which offered a variety of unconventional fried foods, including pickles, Oreos, and Twinkies. And of course, there was the obligatory funnel cake booth.

Ordinarily, I'd jump at the chance for a heart attack on a plate..er, funnel cake, but as we passed by the booth, it mentioned the fact that the cakes were 6 tickets a piece. Tickets? Sure, okay. We turned and found a booth selling tickets. Their only offer? 10 tickets for $10. The hell? So if I wanted to buy what is esentially a $6 funnel cake, and nothing else, I have to spend $10??! They practically wanted to force you to buy other food, or just throw money away. So, we passed. Not to mention the fact that Alton Brown has offered a recipe for funnel cake on his show Good Eats, so I could probably make a bunch of funnel cakes for less than the $6 they wanted.

Even with the overall crapiness of the show, at least I got to spend some time with family, which is the important thing. Next year though..definitely, a different fireworks show.