31 December 2006

It's a Horse! No, it's a moth! No, it's a Butterfly!

Something I caught on "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" on MSNBC. I love how at the end the guy tries to divert attention away from his mistake.

22 December 2006

The 12(more or less) signs of Christmas

Did Christmas just sort of sneak up on you this year? Are you scrambling to purchase and/or mail those packages out to your family members?

Ask yourself, how did you come to be in this predicament? If it's because your lazy, a procrastinator, or like shopping at this time of year (you crazy person you), no need to continue further. Now, if you are one of those people who needs constant reminders that hey, Christmas is coming, and I need to get some things done, well, this might be for you.

Using this handy guide, you'll be able to spot sure fire signs that Christmas is coming, and exactly how long you have left until the big J's birthday.

Two months to go (roughly November 1): Halloween decorations and items mysteriously disappear from stores overnight, only to replaced by Christmas decorations and items. Most common are mint-flavored candies.

A month and a half to go: When watching television, all the movie advertisements you see start using the phrase, "this holiday season."

Just over a month to go: Holiday-themed songs start appearing sporadically on in-store radios.

One month to go: It's Friday, you've got tons of leftovers (mainly turkey), and for some reason people are getting up at 5am to head to Wal-Mart.

Just under a month to go: Santa Claus, Christmas trees, and holiday-themed songs start making appearances in most commercials you see on television.

3 weeks to go: Holiday-themed songs are now the only songs you hear on in-store radios.

2 1/2 weeks to go: People wearing Santa hats and ringing bells next to a big red pot are now loitering in front of your favorite stores.

2 weeks to go: You catch "It's a Wonderful Life" on television.

1 1/2 weeks to go: All the spam you're receiving from the online stores you frequent start adding the phrase "there's still time" to their subject lines.

1 week to go: Anytime you are near a major shopping center, the number of cars seems to have increased.

4 days to go: Strangely, there is more Eggnog than actual milk in the Dairy section.

3 days to go: People start adding the phrase "Happy Holidays" to the end of their sentences.

2 days to go: Those trees you've seen on sale for some reason in front of stores? Well now the price has doubled on them.

1 day to go: Anytime you are near a major shopping center, you get stuck in traffic, get honked at incessantly, and unless your imagining things, that woman in the Santa hat just gave you the finger.

Well, I hope this guide will serve you well next holiday season. Just look for the signs and Happy Holidays! (see? 3 days to go!)

10 December 2006

Wretched hive of scum and villainy

Prepare yourself. If my last "hero origin" post wasn't nerdy enough for you, well, get ready for more nerdy content. This content may not be suitable for "cool people."

This past October, our group of supervillains celebrated its one year anniversary on City of Villains.

When we founded the group, we felt that our group needed a name that stood for the exact opposite of our superhero group. So, since Battle Plan stood mainly for a structured, calculated plan of attack, we wanted a supervillain group name that stood for disorder. We ended up borrowing a line from Ian Malcolm and named them Chaos Theory.

Thus far, the origins of our villains our very similar in that they are "tragic" villains. People that at one point led a seemingly normal life until tragic circumstances led them into a life of villainy. And, in true comic book form, some of the villains share a link to our heroes (It makes for good conflict). I'm sure my co-contributor will follow with his villains, but for now, here are the tragic stories behind my members of Chaos Theory.

Emicrania - We thought it might be fun to create villains based on our cats. Well, kind of. while the villains' origins and personalities are of course nothing like our cats, we felt the powers they possess fit our cats perfectly. Take Emicrania - Spanish for migraine. She has sonic powers, like sonic screams or what not. Get it? Because Mocha is loud. (Mocha edit: And I've been holding back, too!) Emicrania was born with feline features. She still ended up with a somewhat normal upbringing. Her father homeschooled her, but her mother wanted nothing to do with her and was abusive towards Emicrania. It all built up until at one point during a confrontation with her mother, Emicrania yelled so loud the house came down, ending the lives of her parents. She wandered around, enduring intolerance wherever she went. Determined she would never be accepted, she turned to a life of crime.

Phytolacca - A genetically engineered sentient plant "built" via material from the villain group Devouring Earth. Phytolacca was trained as a hero under the wing of Longbow troops. After becoming a skilled agent, he learned a terrible truth. Longbow had designed him to infiltrate the Devouring Earth, at which time Longbow would activate a genetic "bomb" from inside Phytolacca, designed to destroy the Devouring Earth, and him with them. With a newfound affection towards his "brethren" in the DE, Phytolacca visited a group of DE, only to be "rejected" by the DE, due to his artificial nature. In a fit of rage he destroyed the group of DE, then returned to the Longbow base to exact revenge. He managed to destroy the trigger to the genetic bomb before the Longbow defeated him, disavowed any knowledge of him, and threw him in prison. He escaped and is now an outcast from both humans and DE. He vows to destroy both.

Spilled Blood - Lived in the times of the Salem witch trials, where accusations ran rampant. His wife was accused of being a witch and burned at the stake. He never once defended his wife during the trial. As an act of revenge, his wife's sisters learned actual magic and cast a spell on him, one which turned him into a large wolf-like creature. The townsfolk attacked him, despite his pleas that he was no monster. They ended up burning him at the stake, at which time he swore he was innocent of wrongdoing, at one day, when innocent blood was spilled on the ground which he was burned, he would return to wreak vengeance. In modern times, this curse became realized, and he was reanimated in his beastly form, this time with powers that allowed him to manipulate darkforce. His only goal is to find those descendants of the ones who wronged him, no matter how innocent those people are.

Verruckt - Brother to the superhero Dionaea. Verruckt developed his mutant telepathic and telekenetic abilities at a much younger age than his sister, abilities he used to his advantage. He cheated in school, and tortured bullies that tormented him when he was younger. But due to his young age, he wasn't able to adapt to his abilities as well as a teenager would have, and his mind began to warp. He slowly began losing his mind and was indirectly reponsible for his parents' divorce. He went with his father while his sisters stayed with their mother. Verruckt's mind became so warped his father had no choice but to commit him. He was committed to an asylum secretly run by Crey Industries. A doctor there attempted to harness Verruckt's abilities, but there was a freak accident that destroyed half of the asylum. Verruckt survived despite losing part of his skull. He wound up in prison after an insane rampage. Verruckt has a small grip on reality. In the rare moments he does appear sane, he acts very much like the child he was before his powers emerged. Otherwise, he is barely coherent. (On a side note, I love playing him while "in character." Also, "Verruckt" is German for "lunatic.")

Zwietracht - A skilled historian and archaeologist who discovered a buried temple to Eris, Goddess of discord. As she was unearthing and restoring the temple, a battle between super-powered foes erupted nearby. Despite her pleas for the combatants to stop, the fighting continued, and she ended up buried in the rubble of the temple. She was awakened by the spirit of Eris, who offered her great power as long as she acted as Eris' agent on Earth. She accepted, wanting vengeance on the superpowered. However, the rush of power was too much, and she became convinced she was Eris herself, and adopted the German name for "discord." She traveled to Paragon City, where her rampage was halted by Statesman himself. Statesman is in essence Zeus incarnate, so Zwietracht believed she has been punished by Zeus. As she escaped prison, she resolved to earn the god's favor by embracing the ideals of Eris.

And now, to prepare myself for the odd glares I'll be receiving.