Have you tried new MaximumHeight?

In the past few months, NBC has launched a slew of new radio ads for their programming. What's silly about these ads is that they come in the guise of a "casual conversation" between friends. The commercials usually go something like this:

Man #1: So what are you watching tonight?
Woman #1: Oh, NBC has that new critically acclaimed drama, "Lawyer Show #10!"
Man #2: I hear that Guest Star #12 is guest starring on that tonight!
Man #1: I love Guest Star #12! And the show is great, it's so realistic and original. What time is that on again?
Woman #1: 9:00, right after a brand new episode of "Sitcom #578!" I'm ready to laugh out loud!

And so on and so forth. Advertising like this falls into one of my pet peeves about advertising: the odds of actually listening to a conversation like this are slim to none.

Advertisers also like to get away with the "phone conversation" commercial, in which we are led to believe that one person called another to ask them about height supplements for their child, or whatever. One actually went something to the effect of:

Man: I'm worried about the height of my son. He's 15 and hasn't grown an inch!
Woman: Have you tried MaximumHeight?
Man: What's that?
Woman: MaximumHeight! It's a "supplement" that "helps" your child grow in height, and is easy to slip into your kid's glass of milk! No longer will their self esteem suffer! The website is w3.notanactualwebsite.com!
Man: I can remember that website and that product name! Now lets end this casual conversation!

Often there are commercials for medications in which people discuss their medical problems publicly. I believe there was even one where a man walks up to show his passport at airport and is asked, "do you have anything to declare," and his response is "diarrhea!" WHAT?? Who in their right mind would actually say that?! And does security person act offended? No, they actually recommend a product to the man. Yeah, right.

Advertisements like this just don't work anymore in my opinion. Some of my favorite movie parodies of ads like this occur in two movies. First, there's The Truman Show. Truman's wife is always "selling" products to him, till at one point he looks from side to side and responds with "Who are you talking to?" The other is from The Shadow with Alec Baldwin. The Shadow was at one point a radio show, and of course back then they would slip ads into the show. In the film, The Shadow and his nemesis are having a calm discussion about Khan's plans to rule the world, but in the middle of the conversation, Khan breaks in and asks, "that's a lovely tie you're wearing, may I ask where you bought it?" The Shadow responds to the effect of, "Brooks Brothers. 5th and Madison." Brilliant.

What I'm saying is, don't insult our intelligence, advertisers. I don't need a commercial with people having a conversation about a product, and I don't need to see some obscure arthouse type of commercial. Just get to the friggin' point. Tell me what the product is and how cool it is. Stop pretending that me and my friends are sitting down to dinner and actually discussing these things.